Only Funny Poems

I know I should’nt be saying this
But somethings just can’t be helped
My mother taught me to always say what’s on my mind
Instead of burning with fear of what others will think
I’ve remembered that now.
You truly are beautiful
God surely was drinking the finest wine as He put His finishing touches on you.
The wisdom of you eyes spells years of understanding
Your prim soft lips remind me of a gentle caress
Your hair is like silken wool,
thick yet soft to the touch
How I love to lay my eyes on you
For your smile makes my heart sing songs of love
Yes,I know this is madness
So I guess I’ll just put the mirror down and get on with my day!!

Written/Submitted by Linda Tusiime.

One day I met a redhead girl
The morning sun was bright
And sure I took her home with me
And stayed there for a night

We had a talk, I mean we spoke
We had some tea or more
I dreamed, awoke
And found myself
All naked on the floor!

This redhead girl left me alone
But she left not alone
She took my cash along with trash
And furniture is gone

I think I’m gonna be so sad
Don’t laugh cause there’s no fun
I want to go to bed so bad
But I just haven’t one!

There is no bath for me take.
And how can I have lunch?
I have no tables, chairs and plates,
No fridge with food to munch.

I’ll go to Georgia someday
To meet my future wife
But I will never ever deal
With redheads in my life!

Written/Submitted by Alexander Nevzorov.

We love a warm and dry hand to hold
As you held my left hand in your right
Supposedly such a sweet tender moment
Ruined by the moist in between palms
Caused by nervousness on my part
You teasingly pulled away to dry!

Written/Submitted by Fion Lim.

the knocking of my knees when you kiss me,
the message on my ‘phone to say you miss me,
the early morning cup of tea,
your dependability,
your ‘have you washed my pants for me?’
that is what love is.

the way you never falter when i needyou,
the look upon your face that says ‘i love you’,
up and away my heart it flew,
i knew i never would be blue,
like Bostick i will stick to you,
that is what love is.

love is me love is you, love is warm and love is true,
love is sweet love is gentle, love is violent love is mental,
i could be freaked out, fagged out, fed up and flat,
bummed out, buggered out, blind as a bat,
but…i know you will be there to sort out the cat,
the kids,
the washing,
my heart.

the way you pick me up when i am down,
the smile you have created where once there was a frown,
the toilet seat that you put down,
my living room you painted brown,
my world that you turned upside down……….

you make my heart spin round…and round…and round…

that is what love is.

Written/Submitted by john hemming.

The perfect man loves you for you
and not just one tiny part.
The perfect man would sacrifice everything
for you.
The perfect man isn’t afraid to tell you
the truth.
The perfect man is kind, sweet, funny,
and loving.
The perfect man can make you crumble
with one glance.
The perfect man can make you feel
unlike you’ve ever felt before.
The perfect man knows he’s perfect,
but won’t ever admit it.
The perfect man has a smile
that lights up a room.
The perfect man will admit
when he’s wrong.
The perfect man won’t admit
when he’s right.
The perfect man would never say anything
that makes you feel like less of a person.
The perfect man has his beliefs,
but would never force them on you.
The perfect man won’t force you to tell him everything,
but he’s always there if you want to.
The perfect man will sit with you
when you don’t feel like dancing.
The perfect man will know when to take
your hand.
The perfect man will know when he loves you
but won’t tell you until he’s sure he means it.
The perfect man will make you want to be
a better person.
The perfect man does not exist.

Written/Submitted by Kris.

He is ver special
Only To me
Our first date
Was our last
He wasn’t really real
He was a small ballon
And It was love at first sight!

Written/Submitted by Emoni Biggs.

Sometimes my homework is small
Sometimes my homework is long
But whenever i do my homework
My homework is always wrong

Sometimes I do my homework at a slow pace
Sometimes I do my homework in the fast lane
But however I do my homework
my homework is still a pain

Sometimes my homework is easy
Sometimes my homework is hard
But whenever i can’t do my homework
I feel like a retard

Written/Submitted by Michael Rawlinson.

I Open My Windows and What do I See?
More Windows Waiting for Me.
I Open and Close
With the Click of My Mouse
And Watch the Whole World
From Inside My House
Explore Windows and ME

Written/Submitted by Diana J. Bishop.

Woke early one morning,
the earth lay cool and still,
when suddenly a tiny bird,
perched on my window sill,
it sang a song so lovely,
so carefree and so gay,
that slowly all my troubles,
began to slip away,
it sang of far off places,
of laughter and of fun,
it seemed his very song,
brought out the morning sun,
I pulled back the covers,
and crept slowly out of bed,
and gently shut the window,
and crushed his freaking head,
I’m not a morning person

Written/Submitted by Danielle D. Curtis.

A real bubblier,
A real delight,
Making me laughing,
The funny bunny,
Dancing at my sight,
It so funny,
Cuddly and crazy,
Dancing round and round,
Moving those hips,
That crazy thing,
My bunny.

Written/Submitted by Oshane.